Heading back to school can be challenging for some children and may induce feelings of worry, fear, or even grief. Summer is fun, rules are loose, and expectations are low. Kids can feel overwhelmed as they transition back to a more structured schedule that includes more mental output. As parents and teachers, we have a lot of experience with this.
Here are some tips that can help make the transition smoother for both your child and you.
ACKNOWLEDGE & LABEL
Kids aren’t likely to tell you how they are feeling, they are more likely to SHOW you. This might look like reactivity, changes in sleep or eating patterns, crying, or emotional outbursts. When these things happen, it is important to ask yourself and your child, WHY? Consider what might be the underlying feeling that is triggering the behaviour.
Children often need help to label their feelings. Say things like, “It looks like you are feeling worried about something.”, or connect with them by saying, “When I feel scared I cry too.” When we acknowledge a child’s feelings, rather than reacting to the behaviour, we are more likely to find a supportive resolution.
SUPPORT
Once you have identified a feeling, you can then support your child to manage it. Worry or anxiety are commonly triggered by the back-to-school season and may require coping strategies. We have created a number of strategy visuals that can be printed, practiced, and even sent along in a pencil case, for your child to use in times of need. Visit the RESOURCES section of the website for your FREE downloads.
DISTRACT
If your child is feeling anxious about heading back to school, while it is important to talk about, it is equally important not to dwell on it. There is a great analogy from Dawn Huebner’s, “What to Do When You Worry Too Much”, that describes worries as tomatoes. The more you water and tend to them, the more tomatoes you will have. Pretty soon you are eating tomatoes for every meal.
We want to acknowledge and provide space for worry, but put a limit on it. Keep your child busy with other things so their mind stays clear and the stress remains at bay.
PREPARE & PRACTICE
Slowing the transition down over a longer period of time is a good way to prepare for school. Try setting back bedtime a little earlier each night and waking up a little earlier each day. To alleviate stress you might practice getting up, brushing teeth, getting dressed and out the door in a certain time frame in the days leading up to the first day.
Making sure they have all of their supplies and school bags are packed with the things they need will help them feel ready. Your child might feel comforted by the use of a checklist. You can create the list together and then have fun checking things off. The more preparation and practice you put in upfront, the better.
ADVOCATE
If the emotions of returning are significant, be sure to reach out to the school to let them know how your child is feeling. This will better prepare the school staff to provide instant support and implement accommodations when necessary. Remember, your partnership with the school is your child’s biggest asset.
For more tips on advocating, check out our previous blog, “How To Be An Effective Advocate”, along with our Empowered Parent Pages in the RESOURCES section of the website.
Being a parent is hard. Our goal at socialskilled is to make it a little easier and we hope this blog has helped in some small way. We are so happy that you stopped by and would love to hear from you. Send us your questions or suggestions through our website or socials. We are in this together.
Photo by Thomas Park on Unsplash
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